The double bell curve theory
on dating and commitment
November 28, 2013, writing journal entry
My friend Christina has an interesting social theory about:
men,
their age,
and their likelihood of getting married and settling down.
The theory comes from her own time spent in the dating field, but also from extensive observational research.
It’s called the Double Bell Curve Theory, and it illustrates the correlation between the two variables of men’s age and their desire to settle down.
From her experience and research, the two peaks come at around 27 – 30 and around 39 - 41.
The first peak is the, “I love your, we’ve been together for a while, lets do this” peak. The theory would also argue it is the “everyone else is doing it” peak. There is a rush of rings, dresses, parties and commitment. Girlfriends and boyfriends are now husbands and wives.
The dip in commitment is triggered when the single 32 year old looks around at his mates who are now a couple of years into their marriage, there maybe a baby or two, and let’s be honest, things get tough.
The honeymoon is definitely over and settling down has lost its sheen. Dirty nappies, sexless beds and cranky partners don’t make for the greatest endorsement.
So why then, would any male in his mid 30’s, who is probably dating 20 year olds, have any inkling to settle down? Life is good, marriage is not everything it’s cracked up to be, bring on the revolving dating doors.
However, the trend changes and the second peak of commitment hits around 39/40.
The single 39 year old guy looks around and sees most of his friends coupled up, family life has settled down, Saturday sport with Junior is actually pretty fun and husbands and wives are getting on again.
Now the single guy gets the commitment urge, he feels like he is missing out on something and that he wants in. So out come the rings, parties, dresses and commitment.
There is a level of uncertainty about whether the 50 + male species have a diminished urge for commitment, but we hypothesise that if they make it that far without a partner, then it is likely that they are happy to spend their twilight years solo, or playing the field.